Wrapping Up the Tradition of Christmas Cards and Gift Giving
Last year, I decided NOT to send out Christmas cards. So, if you did not receive a card from us last year or this year, please don’t feel offended. No one got one. Instead, I opted to donate what I would have spent on sending out photo cards to a local charity. Between the hundred or so customized cards themselves along with postage cost right around $150. The swap from Christmas cards to charity might not be for everyone and I am not suggesting that everyone do it. I loved sending Christmas cards every year, but when I really thought about it, I realized that donating $150 could make a more positive impact in other ways rather than mailing cards to an extensive list of people, considering that they would likely end up in the garbage after the holiday season anyway.
I am going to be very honest. The real reason I sent out photos cards is because it made ME feel happy. I adored spending time browsing through hundreds of photos (maybe even thousands) and carefully selecting the most striking compilation of me, my husband and our two kids that would be used to showcase the best of the best from the last year. These highlights would be mailed to the lengthy list of coworkers, business associates, close friends (and even some not-so-close friends), extended family members and a handful of acquaintances we would receive a holiday card from who weren’t on my original list, but I would have to add once we received their card.
When I was a kid, I remember my mom writing and addressing by hand a dozen or two Christmas cards, which were bought at the store. It was always fun to pick out the box of cards our family would send to loved ones. We would genuinely select a simple and elegant design that typically demonstrated Christian significance. The illustration on the front of the card and holiday greeting found inside really meant something and cards were only sent to family, close friends, and neighbors.
Today, holiday cards feel like a competition. Most are solely concentrated on displaying family accomplishments versus the true meaning of Christmas. Christmas cards have morphed into a platform to boast. This viewpoint might seem harsh and maybe not all see it this way, but I realized that is exactly what my Christmas card sending routine was all about. I loved showcasing the highlights from our past year; LOVED it. Personally, it felt good to reiterate the high points from the last year (just in case people missed these same highlights from my countless posts to social media). At the end of the day, I was sending out Christmas cards for ME. There was no personal handwritten message to the recipient or even a sloppy signature in cursive. The unsigned, preprinted holiday cards that came from our family (ME) had one point of focus; me and my family. Like most social media posts today, they became very attention seeking and self-serving. Sending holiday cards became selfish. The entire process from creation to delivery was completely missing the point of Christmas.
I have come to feel the same way about gift giving. In fact, I somewhat resent it. It too has become a competition. Who can out give the other person. Whose Christmas was better than another’s. We live in a world where everything has become so commercialized and we all want, want, want. The truth of the matter is that we do not NEED any of it. We spend way too much money and swipe our credit cards for “things” that are unnecessary. Most of us have way too much to begin with and then get lost in the season of list-making and gift-giving to acquire more of what we already have. Getting presents is fun and giving gifts is even better, but Christmas is not about gifts or Christmas cards.
This Christmas instead of Christmas cards and purchasing excess and elaborate gifts, I chose to use my time and money on connection. I am sharing this idea because we could all stand to do more of it. Having coffee with a friend, stopping by someone’s home (or business) with a simple holiday treat, scheduling lunch with someone who has meant a lot to you over the years… My list of people that I personally connected with this year was a lot shorter than the hundred or so people I used to send cards to. But those who I connected with in person mean a lot to me. My time and resources were used more carefully and not concentrated on personally being front and center. No pictures were taken for social media. No need to boast or brag. My whole goal was to be as selfless as possible. Do what is right with others in mind.
Christmas is not about expensive cards, trendy gifts, or the number of presents under the tree. If you took all those things away, how would you spend the holiday season? Who would it be with? Would it be better? Could it be more meaningful? Christmastime is about the people in your life (the ones who truly matter) and letting them know that you appreciate them through a deeper connection. It is about experiences not things. It is also about the birth of our Savior. We must remember that.
If you were one of those people on my short list this year; know that you hold a special place in my life and I appreciate you a great deal. Thank you and Merry Christmas.
